Normal feelings during pregnancy… The good, the bad, and the ugly.

Pregnancy is a long tough journey. It is also a special and life changing time. Something that not everyone will get the privilege of experiencing during their time.

During pregnancy your body goes through the biggest changes possibly of its life. Hormones rage and your body may take a beating…

“Coming to terms” with things has been a reoccurring event during my pregnancy and I think it is valid for any pregnancy no matter how long you are pregnant for.

The biggest thing I want to start by saying is however you feel during pregnancy is normal and a part of your journey.

Don’t be afraid to reach out for help if you ever feel unsafe to yourself or others. It can all be a part of your individual journey and being safe is number one priority.

Finding our your pregnant:

This can be a really exciting or really scary time. Depending on your journey to get to being pregnant their can be totally conflicting feelings.

For people who have been trying for a long time I have no doubt there is feelings of relief but also fear as you haven’t yet reached the ‘safe’ zone in your pregnancy.

There can also be feelings of “I don’t want to be to happy about this yet in case we lose it.”

That is a totally normal feeling to have and one I had! Wanting to tell people but again that fear of losing your baby… you can still choose to tell people it just means your making the choice to have them involved if you do lose your bub.

I have a post more on when you should tell your family and friends here:

Finding our your pregnant, especially if you haven’t planned it can be a really tough time. There might be some hard decisions for you on your own or you and your partner to make.

In life we have these sort of conflicting decisions all the time. Sometimes these choices leave a lasting impact on us. That is ok.

REMEMBER: What ever you choose is right for you, take care of both your physical and mental health during this time!

An unplanned pregnancy can be a really exciting but really nerve wracking time. There can be fears like the following:

  • Fear of what people will think
  • Fear of losing your baby
  • Fear of not being ready for a baby
  • Fear of being a bad person for maybe not wanting a baby right now or maybe ever
  • Fear of birth
  • Fear of your partner not wanting a family
  • Fear of the unknown and what is coming
  • Fear of getting morning sickness

Honestly the list goes on and if you have felt one or all of he fears above you are totally normal.

If you have felt none that is totally ok to! Some people have the innate ability to just focus on the next step and the good in a situation and that’s fantastic!

Finding our your pregnant is a big deal and no matter how you feel afterwards you are going to make a great parent if you decide that now is your time!

The first trimester:

The first trimester was the hardest for me personally. The first trimester is when you are most likely to be hit with a range of wonderful side affects….

It is also the time you generally may start telling people you are pregnant and this can be really stressful for some people!

Being sick makes you feel awful yeah. But usually your only sick maybe for a week or two…

The first trimester was never ending sickness for me and the hard part was that not everyone has it like that!

Everywhere I looked I saw people who were in their first trimester who loved their pregnancy and were all caught up in the butterflies and rainbows of it.

Then there was me. If I didn’t sleep 20 hours a day I couldn’t function for the few hours left in the day. I was simply feeling like a permanently exhausted pigeon. I was grey and tired…

Plus I was NEVER hungry, all I wanted was to eat as I knew I would feel better for it. But guess what. Most of the time eating ended in one thing and I didn’t want to do that…

Some days I couldn’t even keep water down.

I actually ended up in hospital needing fluids after almost 48 hours of keeping nothing down.

Let me tell ya the anti-nausea’s that dissolve are a life saver!

So for me, I was excited sure, about my new blessing to have a family. But I simply couldn’t find the butterflies and rainbows. Where were they?

I felt guilty because I was saying so often how much I HATED being pregnant. I knew it made my fiancé worry to start with but with time, we realized I didn’t hate our baby (how could I?), I just hated constantly feeling awful.

What I am saying is! You don’t have to love being pregnant for your to love your baby more than anything in the world.

Pregnancy is just one part of becoming a parent and that is important to remember.

Pregnancy is special in the sense you are growing your beautiful new baby and on the journey to becoming a family.

It is important to remember that even when it feels like it is the hardest thing you have ever done.

And if you have that magical pregnancy I am so happy for you! Because being able to find the magic whether your well or not is a total super power!

Remember to go easy on yourself your growing another human in there….

The second trimester:

The second trimester can be the best time of all during pregnancy…

Your not to big and uncomfortable and you also might finally get some relief from morning sickness and aversions!

This is generally a time where people might enjoy eating out again and enjoy a bit of time with family!

I was still sick until about 22 weeks, and after this I did actually begin to enjoy my pregnancy which was great!

I could feel baby moving at about 16 weeks just indistinctly, by 18 weeks she was full fledged kicking.

It made it all worth it to me, I was proud of getting through what I had for our daughter.

That is another great thing about the second trimester you get to find out your new family members gender!

You may choose not too and that is totally cool! But for me I was super excited to know…

Finding our we were having a daughter added to my excitement I couldn’t believe it.

One thing to remember though, it is ok to be disappointed if you were wanting a boy or a girl and you may not get it! It is totally normal to feel disappointed when we have expectations or ideas in our head!

Remember a gender reveal may not be a great idea if you have your heart set on one or the other!!

Either way you will love your baby so go easy on yourself!

The third trimester:

This is another time during pregnancy that can involve a lot of angst as you get closer to meeting your new family member!

It is also normal to really fear or feel nervous about your upcoming birth!

Birth is a totally new thing in some situations and even if it isn’t for your it is ok to be nervous!

Chatting to your midwife about what makes you nervous can help!

If you are the sort of person who is empowered b knowledge then by all means do your research but research *positive* birth stories!

Feeling impatience to meet baby is totally normal!

Also sometimes being uncomfortable with your changing body can be a big part of pregnancy too.

Talking to ladies on mums Facebook groups can help you feel normal! Just make sure you choose carefully which advice you take on as what works for one may not work for you!

Sometimes feeling protective over your baby and yourself can be totally normal too, but ensure you aren’t hurting anyone around you when you get feelings of overwhelm.

For me our puppy was too much, if he overwhelmed me I got really grouchy, but also coming to terms with it and being like ok! I am gonna work really hard to make our interactions positive really helped!

Again there is so many amazing resources available to you during pregnancy and making the most of them is important!

Also in the third trimester it is important to slow down.

I have been battling with this one, kind of trying to ignore how I am feeling! It doesn’t work trust me…

Focus on taking care of yourself else you will send yourself crazy oh and also probably end up run down and sick… not talking from experience lol.

You only get to have your third trimester one, maybe a few times in your life so make the most of it!

It is ok for you to slow down… not long and life is going to be very busy!

The point of this post is to make you realize you can feel however you want at any point in your pregnancy and it is NORMAL.

Tell me below what feelings you had during pregnancy you weren’t expecting? Or follow me below and let me know!

Other posts like this one:

https://arealmumnz.com/2022/08/24/a-real-mum-to-be/

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